There has been a lot of noise about Tony Robbins and his input on #Metoo and I think a lot of people are missing the point, he has massive a huge responsibility and what he says has a massive impact, while he was referring to victimisation, he was disempowering the 1000’s of people who for the first time dared to speak out, open themselves up and speak out. Even if it was to feel some sort of significance, and why shouldnt they?
For those who dared to speak up and come out, this can be seen as a massive blow to them, what if this their first step and then someone like Tony Robbins labels them as victims? When finally, they are starting to feel like victors. I am not bashing anyone.
While I have a lot respect for the guy, he too makes mistakes but he also has to take responsibility for the effect and impact his words have, sadly lately he seems to be involved a fair few mishap’s. I can see most people who are not getting the impact part of what Tony has done mostly likely have never dealt with sexual abuse.
I have had an experience and I take full responsibility for the event that happened when I was 12 and speak very openly about it, however it took me years to deal with it and if at the time someone like Tony Robbins came out to what felt like bashing or labelling me and my efforts I would have retracted. That’s the danger of his words thats the bigger picture at play here.
The other side to this which is really annoying me about the Tony Robbins #Metoo which has been sweeping Facebook and social media. Some people have taken it upon themselves to devalue and determine who is a victim and who isn’t as well as to what level they are a victim, I have seen it across several posts and comments and it’s disgusting!
I am reading things like:
😠Rape isn’t the same as sexual abuse therefore the effects are different
😠Someone who was groped isn’t effected in the same way as someone who is sexually abused
etc etc etc…
Now people with a lack of any understanding are creating levels? Someone who is horribly abused over time but never raped is better off than someone who has?
One is better than the other therefore easier to deal with?
Who are these people to make a decision or assumption of how these experiences effect people? and to what level? Suddenly these people are experts on sexual abuse! Do me a favour and unless you are a Dr of Psychology dealing with sexual trauma shut your trap.
While staying in victimhood is disempowering in the long run for a lot of people it is the first step to dealing with their experiences.
Just like when anything needs addressing the first step is to admit you have a problem.For the first time in history there is a movement of people who can freely stand up and open up and about what happened and belong, not feel isolated and be part of something that hopefully will create positive change.
If it means a for little while people are allowed to be victims to heal, to move on, to vent then it’s the first step even if it’s the third step….as long as they are moving forwards and eventually own it. The worst part about reading those posts and comments is they are written by men and a lot of them coaches! After all, doesn’t Tony teach that step number 1 for any coach is to accept the other person model of the world? I am not seeing that in this case.